She sat quietly on her bed, pondering the question her father, a pastor, had asked her and her sister on the drive home from youth group: Do you ever think about dying? At 16 years old, it wasn’t something she’d spent a lot of time thinking about … but now seemed like the right time to do so.

No, she decided, she wasn’t afraid to die … because she knew where she was going. Little did anyone know, in just a few days’ time, her faith would become sight. She would be going home, and she had no regrets.

Last November, God led me to a remarkable story that I desperately needed to hear. This story still impacts me today, and I pray it will do the same for you.

A fellow Christian writer, who I’d only virtually met through COMPEL Pro Writer Training, told me about a memoir that a spiritual mentor of hers had written after her daughter, Kayla, passed away in a non-reckless car accident in 2018. The name of the book is She Had No Regrets: The Life of a Girl Who Knew Who She Was, written by Julia Kay Duerler, Kayla’s mother. Julia and her husband, Jeff, are leaders of a church called LifeSpring Community Church in the Cincinnati, Ohio area.

At the time, I was struggling with grief of my own after 11-year-old Jersey Poff, a Jesus-loving girl at my church, had tragically died a few months earlier. I was desperate for some hope, some evidence that God could make such a heartbreaking situation into something so beautiful.

This book was exactly that.

So I dove eagerly into the story, not paying much attention to the details behind it. As I read on, I noticed that it mentioned Miami University in Oxford, Ohio. Hmm, that’s interesting, I thought, I wonder where they lived.

Before I started reading, I had no clue where, geographically, this story took place, but my interest was piqued. I did some quick research and was astounded to find that the Duerler family lived in Harrison, Ohio – just two hours south of where I live.

It seemed like the biggest coincidence in the world at the time … but I now know that it was anything but.

As I continued to read, I was amazed at how Julie described Kayla, both in her own words and Kayla’s, and how the story gave me access to Kayla’s inner thoughts and spiritual growth. The book is also chock full of artwork, drawings and photographs created by Kayla – a unique and beautiful touch.

By the time I finished the book, I really felt like I knew Kayla … even though we never met in this life. To me, she is a sister in Christ whose memory I will always treasure, and I can’t wait to meet her someday on the other side.

I would love for you to read this book for yourself, so I won’t give too much away, but there was one particularly poignant moment in the book that I’d like to highlight.

In the chapter “Peacemaker,” Julie recounts some of Kayla’s final days and how God helped her to grant forgiveness to a friend. “The matter was truly settled in her heart,” Julie writes. “Kayla was ready to go without regrets.”

In her final journal entry written the night before the accident, Kayla penned a Bible verse she had carried close to her heart all her life. Julie refers to it as “her Psalm of praise for the help God gave her.”

The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him.

– Psalm 28:7

Amazingly, this is exactly the lens that Julie chooses to look through when she envisions the final moments Kayla experienced just before she passed away, as remembered by Kayla’s grandparents, who were with her in the car and survived the crash:

“… even after the impact, she had peace till the end. She gave no cry or moan and her last breath was a quiet sigh. God was her strength, and he shielded her soul. Her heart trusted him, and he helped her. Her heart leaps for joy, and with her song she praises him for all eternity.”

I’m simply awestruck and inspired by Julie’s faith. Even in this heartbreaking moment that changed their entire lives in a heartbeat – she and Jeff continue to praise God for his goodness.

This is what God’s perfect peace looks like in the midst of unspeakable pain.

Although Kayla has been gone for more than six years now, the Kingdom work she did here continues. Her prayer and passion was to be the “epicenter of a Jesus earthquake,” setting off powerful ripples of impact in the world and leading more people to Jesus.

I know I don’t just speak for myself when I say that Kayla’s Jesus earthquake shook me in a powerful way – no matter the time and space between us.

If you’d like to learn more about Kayla’s story or what has happened since, you can follow updates from “She Had No Regrets” on Facebook and Instagram. The book She Had No Regrets: The Life of a Girl Who Knew Who She Was is available for purchase on Amazon.

Jesus will come when we are least expecting it, but we won’t be surprised when it happens. We are God’s children, we know where we are going. That should affect everything we do – our entire lifestyle.

– Kayla Marie Duerler